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Thursday, May 04, 2006

SuicideGirls, the aftermath...

Okay, so it's been 24 hours, and I have yet to recieve a reply to the email I sent to Missi, the head of SuicideGirls. I have since found out from others that it is the norm for them to not reply to emails regarding why their applications were turned down. So we may never know whether or not they rejected me because I am plus size or not. I mean, let's just say that they did reject me because of my size, hypothetically. They would never admit it, either in an email to me or anywhere else. Admission to such things could put them in hot water, after all! Any smart company would never admit to such things.

I do understand that thier rejecting me was a business decision. That they had to consider who would be "right" or "wrong" for the site and it's audience. Of course, most sites that use models in this way must think of these things. BUT that doesn't mean I still don't have my suspicions! When I told people about my applying for SuicideGirls, the general reply I got was "Well, good luck! They don't accept many plus sized girls!" So naturally when I was rejected, I immediately went "Hmmmm, maybe they were right!" Hearing from others that they were rejected due to thier size seemed to make the suspicion more valid. We'll never know the truth of it, ever. But I do and will always have my strong suspicions.

For me, applying to the site meant that I'd have access to thier site. It also meant that I could call myself a SuicideGirl. The fact that I didn't get access to thier site without paying sucked. I also didn't get to have bragging rights. That kind of blows. But the very idea that they rejected me or anyone due to thier size made me pissed enough to take action. I'm the type of person to fight for things. But fighting for something I cannot prove is a waste of time. I can have suspicions all day long, but until I can prove my suspicions to be truth, there is nothing to fight for.

I had edited my post last night to make sure people knew that I only suspected they rejected me due to my size. I know that the syndicated feed went out to LiveJournal before I could edit it in time, so if I gave anyone the impression that I was DEFINATELY rejected for my size, I apologize. It sucks that I didn't get my way, but life can and will go on. I only hope that SuicideGirls really don't reject people due to size or anything else, because companies like that went out of style (for lack of a better phrase) in the last century.

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